Confession: I used to have virtually no confidence.
I’ll never forget back when my knees would jiggle-like-jello when I’d “try” to talk to a cute woman. It was like torture! Every second felt like an hour long!
My palms would sweat…
I couldn’t even speak clearly…
My heart would beat way too damned fast…
And girls would “excuse themselves” from my presence 99% of the time…
I HATED IT.
Here’s a picture of me back then…
Since I was so fed up, I decided to do something about lacking confidence.
So, I went on a mission: to build up my confidence.
I did everything. Read every book. Dove in head first to my academic psychology courses. And most of all? Being a college student at the time? I used the fact that I was on a university campus in sunny southern California each day to talk to the women that were there too!!
Oh yes… During about a 9 month period, I easily chatted up SEVERAL THOUSAND college women on my campus.
It got to the point that I accidentally hit on the same girl multiple times.
(This admittedly happened at least 3 times — once inside the student library, once in the on-campus Jamba Juice, and once outside our college basketball stadium — LOL).
As you can probably see, the way I “came up” came with consequences. For example, I was eventually known as the “that pickup guy” on my university, amongst my peers…
It’s why I now recommend guys find a bigger “pond to practice fishing in” if they wanna go on a pickup rampage like I did, to both get more dates and build more confidence.
To be honest, getting the momentum to confidently approach women didn’t come fast or easily.
Probably took three months of intense internal pain and struggle until I simply got over my approach anxiety.
If only I had known then, what I do now…
Working on those things will help you improve your confidence. And in turn, you’ll start getting better results both professionally and romantically…
But those things are like the “extra toppings” you put on your ice cream…
Here’s what helped my catapult my confidence (and my dating results) the most:
Learning to pat myself on the back after each approach — and giving myself uplifting self talk — regardless of the “result” my actions just produced (or didn’t produce). Learning this is how I got rid of my anxiety. This one insight changed my life.
So please, steal this from me and use it in your life when you push your comfort zones and work towards becoming more confident.
After you take action, say to yourself, “Nice job, way to take action! Good work.”
The secret is to VALIDATE YOURSELF with POSITIVE SELF TALK each time you approach a girl, make a sales call, give a speech, or do an interview — regardless of what external result your action(s) deliver you.
Validating yourself with positive self talk IS the secret to ensuring you ALWAYS feel more confident each time you push your comfort zones and take bold actions.
Here’s what my former client has to say about this system I teach men to build their confidence…
“With Jason, anything is possible.
He understands the challenges one experiences in life through a series of disappointments and hardships. However, he also knows how to turn this around. He believes one can make a transformation as long as the individual also takes the initiative to do so.
As a mentor, Jason is always dedicated in helping you stay on track to achieving success. Clearly, he wants you to succeed and learn how to develop the techniques needed to transform your life/situation for the better.
Through his Confidence Building Sequence, he provides you with a strategy to deal with any fear you have, whether it is public speaking or meeting new people. Jason reaffirms this over and over until it is part of your philosophy.
Thank you, Jason for making a difference in my life!”
-Manny M., BS/MS Public Administration
For you, if you’re looking for more confidence, the secret is learning to trust the process. Remember this: the only way you’ll replace your anxiety with confidence (and the results that’ll follow) is by taking consistent action! We know this from research.
But if you’re always beating yourself up along the way? Then you’ll kill your momentum! And you’ll never build yourself into the confident guy you know is deep inside of you!
So, pat yourself on the back — and speak to yourself like the champ that you are — each and every time you push your comfort zones!
Talk to yourself like the champ you’re becoming after taking action. Then? Once the little “positive self talk sesh” is over? And once you tell yourself, “Nice job, champ, way to take action.” Then? Get back to work! Use the momentum you just received, by validating yourself, to take more action!
This is how YOU will build the confidence to…
- approach women with confidence
- deliver epic public speeches
- make more sales calls (and thus more commission)
- talk to anyone, anywhere, at anytime
So what are you waiting for? Get to work, my good man! You now have the key to the castle — that is more confidence!
To your peak,
Transform Your Confidence -- Guaranteed
Approach women with confidence. Create abundance. You’ll discover how here. Learn the #1 secret to approach women confidently…
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